I’m back… Moalboal – Cebu Philippines

May 9, 2011 § Leave a comment


I’ve decided that work really is not worth me neglecting my beloved blog… URL might be moving soon, but will keep you all posted on that.

fun little bar in maolboalThe year has been great and i’m hoping to get some backlog entered as I’ve had some good trips to Seoul, Phu Quoc Island, Angeles City and Cebu.

What’s amazing about Asia to me is you can go to the quietest town with a population of 2 and still manage to have a damn good time…

Over the last few months I’ve had an interesting phenomenon occur.  Business is going ok, I’ve got some great managers in place now, so I’ve found myself with a ton of time… I started using my time to work out more then screwed up my shoulder so for the last few weeks I’ve just been feenin things to do.  It seems like a great problem to have but i realized it can get quite boring when you’re friends are all working!

Three days ago I got a call from my homie  from Korea. He found out he had a couple extra weeks vacation and decided that since there was a direct flight from Seoul, a Cebu trip was in order…  I looked at it, decided since Pacquiao was fighting, the NBA playoffs was on (the PI has a 24 hour basketball channel) and I love the beach, I might as well just join him!

One thing I really hope to do with this blog is remember my experiences and point you in the direction of places that don’t suck.  I say that because my buddy was reading up on Maolboal and some blogger wrote it’s the spot to drink – dive – relax – in that order… Well, if you’re thoughts around drinking are sitting around 4 small bars listening to drunk expats tell stories about how facebook, twitter and microsoft are all branches of the CIA (this is no fucking joke! I listened to this guy swear he can produce proof that CIA operatives run each company and he proceeded to liken Bill Gates to a figurehead along the same lines as Ronald McDonald).

I digress — So to put it in a the proper perspective, Moalboal is a place to DIVE – RELAX – DRINK. The diving is awesome, it’s a beautiful place to relax, and you can have some drinks at the bar.

With that said, I have had a blast for four reasons:

1. I’m here with one of my best friends in the world.  We don’t see each other much and this place has given us a lot of time to chill all the way back, have some drinks and talk shit… The 2nd day here we started out for lunch at the 7 Sins bar. After our lunch, my buddy’s dad showed up and ordered as well.  One thing to keep in mind about this place is it moves SLOW.  If you are from NYC and expect fast service, I suggest putting in a mouthpiece to keep from biting your tongue as it’s not gonna happen here.  Pop’s lunch took about an hour to arrive.  2 hours later, we were still at 7 Sins, shooting pool, talking shit, and one bottle drunker!

2. There is something to be said for small town fun. I think there are 4 bars here, maybe 5.  The Beach Bar, 7 Sins, Chili Bar and Pacitas.  Each bar will have 2-3 average girls and, possibly one above average girl working.  Each place we hopped into on Friday had a fun, chill vibe.  By the end of the night, we’d met every diver in town who likes to drink, we met every girl in town who works at the bars, every bar owner, and we managed to meet a group of nurses who popped in from Cebu city.  The common denominator with EVERY person we met is they asked us, are you going to the disco tomorrow!

On Saturday night, Pacitas does the “disco”.  It’s literally a one night a week club night. spectacle.  It’s actually a decent (for small town standards) club night with two rooms, DJ and beautiful deck overlooking the water. So we checked it out and EVERYBODY was there… There is something to be said for a town that’s like a family.  How many places will you go in your life where the owners extend tabs to strangers and offer to go out and change your money for you?

3. Everybody needs to relax.  If you are one of those types who are running on 90% most of the time, take 2-3 days and come to a place like this.  The water crashes up against the side of the hotel room, there are no cars, the food is excellent, and there are hardly any TV’s in town.

4. No matter where you go in Asia, you’ll always find some girls 🙂  Now, I can’t claim that a bagged a Jessica Alba look alike, but, I can say, if you want to get a little something something, it’s there for the taking.  You’ve got two choices, game up a cute nice girl who works behind one of the 4 bars and take advantage of the fact she’s hoping for marriage (not my favorite thing to do for morality purposes — yes, those of you who don’t like prostitution should really evaluate your other options for one night stands as it’s not often you meet girls who are simply down for that without carrying other hopes and dreams) , or… Wander around late at night (watch out for the lady boys) and magically, they appear! The first night I was so hammered that I barely remember how it all went down… But, basically a tranny was trying to pick me up, I said no thanks, asked for a girl, and there she was… She wanted me to go back to some room but I refused as even in a place like this you never know.  So we went to my hotel (Sevedra Beach Resort, no TV as an FYI, 1800 Pesos a nigth, oceanside), had a little fun, and she was on her way…She asked me how much, I suggested 2,000 pesos and she was happy as could be.

The next night was even worse than the first from an alcohol perspective.  We took down a bottle of $5 rum, had a grip of vodka red bull, tequila, jaeger, and then some Apple Rum at the DISCO! whoo hoo… man from what i remember it was off the chain (mild sarcasm).  But, on the real, it was pretty fun.  We met up with our diver homies, saw the nurses, met some girls from Denmark, made out with one of the girls from the bar, hung with a family, i mean literally, everyone was there.  By the end of the night, my buddy had a plateful of pork skewers and i was hemmed up by this girl I’d been dancing with for an hour.  She wanted to go back to my room so I obliged….

FULL DISCLOSURE, my recollection of her was that she was NOT cute… When all was said and done, she was ready to go, i was damn near passed out and she asked me to give her some money.  Two problems with this, one, I had to lecture her on the business ethics of full disclosure.  Two, I had no money! One thing to know about Moalboal is that there are NO ATMs within 1 hour of the town.  Only the hotel takes credit cards.  Being the sweetheart she was, she offered to extend me a line of credit for 1000 pesos. (this made me realize i was far too generous the night before with the other girl)

Sunday came and it was the Pacquiao fight.  Worst fight I’ve ever seen due to Mosley running around the ring the whole time.  If you come to the PI, keep in mind two things, they are very religious so Sunday is a quiet day unless you’re somewhere like Angeles City.  When Pacquiao fights, it’s like a national holiday… So, we couldn’t even get a car to go get money from the ATM!  Sunday afternoon, the restaurants kindly extended us a line of credit and we will be sending money back with the driver…

What a place…. I love it, and am also glad I’m leaving after 3 days as I’m a city boy at heart!

Stay tuned – We’ve got a big night planned in Cebu City tonight!

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